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1. Once you’re committed, you’ll find that others may find you more attractive. It’s crucial to establish and maintain boundaries.
2. Every marriage faces difficulties; the secret lies in utilizing these challenges to develop your bond.
3. You might be prepared for marriage, but if your partner isn’t, it can lead to significant frustration. Make sure not to love the wrong person in the right way.
4. Marriage isn’t the only focus in life; pursue your individual goals even while working as a team.
5. When you view yourselves as a unit, competition between you decreases.
6. Engage in activities together as a couple; love is fostered through shared experiences.
7. Be cautious about whom you seek advice from. Some individuals are unhappy in their own relationships and may not support your happiness.
8. Recognize that marriage has various phases: the bonding phase, the conflict phase where you navigate your space together, the challenging phase where you might consider ending things, and the phase where you emerge stronger through shared victories. Identify the phase you are in.
9. Without preparing for children, their arrival can shift the focus and affection you two share. Many marriages struggle when parenting begins.
10. Someone is observing how you navigate your marriage; consider what lessons you are imparting.
11. Unresolved issues from your singles days will resurface in your marriage. Focus on personal growth.
12. Just because your parents’ marriage ended poorly doesn’t mean yours will too, and their success doesn’t guarantee yours. Take responsibility for your relationship.
13. Avoid giving so much power to your spouse that they influence you to abandon your values, lose sleep, live unhappily, and jeopardize your dreams. Protect yourself if they become negative.
14. Any marriage can overcome challenges as long as both parties are willing to forgive, adapt, and put effort into ensuring love is felt, allowing for recovery and progress.
15. Focusing on your spouse’s flaws will divert your attention to temporary distractions.
16. Financial issues, disagreements, and decision-making are more manageable when friendship is the foundation of your marriage.
17. Intimacy involves more than just physical relations. Foster a deeper connection through affection, cuddling, kisses, and meaningful conversations.
18. Your parents might have good intentions, but their biases and past experiences can negatively affect your marriage. They had their own lives; create your own. Decide which advice to heed and which to disregard.
© Akello Oliech and Dayan Masinde
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