Are you wondering if it’s okay to desire a spouse who catches your eye? Single brothers and sisters, let’s talk about finding a partner who sparks joy in every way—spiritually, emotionally, and yes, physically! Marrying someone you’re proud to call yours isn’t carnal—it’s a beautiful gift from God when paired with godly character.
Why Physical Attraction Matters in a Christian Marriage
It’s not just about inner beauty—though that’s vital! Marrying someone you’re not physically attracted to can lead to regret. Imagine hesitating to introduce your spouse to friends or avoiding date nights because you’re not proud of their appearance. That’s a tough road no one should walk.
As a professional marriage counselor, I’ve seen couples struggle when physical attraction is missing. Some never go out together—not for lack of time or money, but because they’re not excited about their partner’s appearance. This can dim the joy of marriage and even affect intimacy. Don’t settle out of desperation, dear singles! Your spouse doesn’t need to be a supermodel, but you should feel a spark that makes you say, “That’s my person!” with pride.
A Balanced Approach to Choosing a Spouse
A successful Christian marriage blends multiple layers of attraction:
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Spiritual Connection: Are they rooted in faith and aligned with God’s purpose for your life?
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Emotional Bond: Do they make you feel safe, valued, and understood?
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Intellectual Compatibility: Can you engage in meaningful conversations?
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Social Fit: Are you excited to show them off to your circle?
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Physical Attraction: Do they light up your heart (and eyes)?
Ignoring physical attraction in the name of “spirituality” can lead to struggles, especially in intimacy. God won’t force you to marry someone you don’t find appealing. As the Bible says, “Every good and perfect gift is from above” (James 1:17). A spouse who reflects God’s goodness should bring joy in every way!
Don’t Settle for Less—But Don’t Chase Looks Alone
But remember, physical attraction alone won’t sustain a marriage. Look for a partner who:
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Shares your faith and values.
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Supports your dreams and goals.
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Is trustworthy, kind, and a true team player.
Without these, even the most attractive spouse may leave you unfulfilled. Avoid marrying a “Leah” when your heart longs for a “Rachel”—but also ensure your “Rachel” has the heart and character to build a lasting, godly marriage.
God’s Guidance for Your Love Story
Physical attraction is a piece of the puzzle, but it’s not the whole picture. Seek God’s will above all. Pray for a spouse who excites you and aligns with His plan for your life. Trust Him to lead you to someone who makes your heart sing—spiritually, emotionally, and physically.
May God guide you to a marriage filled with love, joy, and mutual admiration!