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Amy’s quest for liberation from alcohol was filled with obstacles. Growing up, she was always around alcohol—her father enjoyed beer during her childhood, and later she began to explore alcohol herself in middle school. While many consider drinking a typical part of social events, for Amy, it became something she needed to manage. Over time, the question, Can you quit drinking when your partner still drinks?, turned into a pivotal part of her journey.
In this blog, Amy recounts her path to sobriety while in a relationship with a partner who continued to drink, highlighting the changes she’s undergone since then. If you’ve ever wondered how to liberate yourself from alcohol’s grip while living with someone who drinks, her story could provide the clarity and motivation you need to make a change.
The Allure of the Forbidden
As a child, alcohol was somewhat of an enigma to me. My parents, due to their beliefs, avoided it entirely. This made it all the more enticing as I grew older. It felt like a secretive, thrilling realm just waiting for exploration.
When I finally encountered alcohol, it seemed like the “elixir of life,” much like Annie Grace describes in her book, This Naked Mind. I truly believed it made every moment more enjoyable, lively, and exciting. Whether during a casual meeting or a hard day, a glass of wine felt like the ideal addition, smoothing out difficulties and enhancing the joyful moments. Reflecting on it now, this belief heavily influenced my early drinking patterns. I connected alcohol with happiness, comfort, and an improved quality of life.
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Realizing a Problem Existed
My perception of alcohol shifted from “elixir of life” to “problem” in my mid-thirties. As a single mom to a young son, life became overwhelming. This was when I started drinking nightly—not just a glass occasionally, but regularly. I’m ashamed to admit some events from this time—thanks to luck, I didn’t harm anyone, but I did drive under the influence more than once, and the thought of the potential consequences still unsettles me.
Aside from those terrifying moments, there were more subtle but alarming signs. I ruined at least three laptops due to wine spills after dozing off on the couch with a glass in hand and my computer in my lap. This became a frequent occurrence, showcasing just how much I was drinking and how easily I would fall asleep.
The most heart-wrenching moments involved my son. At around ten years old, he voiced his concerns, saying he wished I wouldn’t drink so much because, as he put it, I “started to talk funny” after a few glasses. Hearing that from my child was devastating. Later, as a teenager, he told me he wanted me to quit because he could see it was making me unhappy. Despite these heartfelt requests from the person I cherished most, I still felt trapped in my habits. There were countless more incidents, but I’ll refrain from going into too much detail. They were clear indications that I was consuming more alcohol than I should, and I was acutely aware of them.
Attempts at Regaining Control and Failing
Prior to discovering a true solution, my efforts to moderate my drinking were mainly powered by sheer will. I’d wake up each morning with determination, vowing, “Today’s the day I won’t drink.” Sometimes, this resolve would last for a few hours or even a day. Yet, as evening approached and the pressures of single motherhood increased, I’d find myself reaching for that glass of wine again.
Additionally, I experimented with different strategies, including Allan Carr’s “Easy Way.” For a brief moment, it gave me hope—it worked for about a week! But then something would set me off, and I’d find a justification to drink, ending up back in the same cycle. It felt like a relentless struggle, and honestly, I was worn out from battling myself day after day. The endless cycle of attempts, failures, and guilt was mentally exhausting. It felt like I was trapped in a never-ending loop, unable to see a way out. This persistent struggle was yet another undeniable sign that my drinking was excessive.
My Turning Point: Desperation and a Kindle Book
My path to discovering a lasting answer began from a place of deep desperation. I was scouring the web for anything that could help. I repeatedly encountered recommendations for Annie Grace’s book, This Naked Mind, across various forums. Many claimed it had genuinely changed their lives. So, in a moment of desperation, I purchased it on Kindle.
And then I let it gather dust. For two years! Can you believe that? The first time I finally opened the book, I read a line about Allan Carr’s method, and my immediate thought was, “Oh no, this won’t…”
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“I’ve already attempted that.” With that, I shut the book and set it aside.
It wasn’t until I hit a truly desperate moment, when the weight of my drinking—both internally and externally—became too much to bear, that I resolved to give it another shot. I kept encountering stories in forums, those gentle words from strangers saying, “Her book transformed my life.” The steady stream of positive testimonials finally encouraged me to try again. I’m so glad I did!
The Simple Change That Made All the Difference
Honestly, it almost sounds too straightforward to be effective, but all I needed to do was read Annie Grace’s book, This Naked Mind. I also took some moments to jot down my reflections on her insights. Several key ideas jumped out at me—essential concepts that set this experience apart from anything I had tried before. It wasn’t about willpower or sacrifice; it was about grasping the true essence of alcohol and understanding our reasons for consuming it.
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And the most amazing part? I managed to quit drinking just by reading that book. There was no gradual decrease; there were no painful struggles—just a significant shift in my perspective. Not only did I stop drinking, but I was (and still am!) incredibly thrilled about it. It’s been over four years, and I can honestly say it’s the best decision I’ve ever made, second only to having my son. The freedom and happiness I experience are nearly indescribable.
My Life Today: A Transformation I Never Expected
My current life is absolutely unrecognizable in the best way possible. The transformations that have occurred since I quit drinking are amazing. For instance, I shed about 40 pounds. I look nearly a decade younger, and my blood pressure is back to normal. Beyond the physical changes, the internal transformations have been even more significant. I experience deep, restorative sleep each night. My mind is clear—no more brain fog or memory lapses. I cherish being present in every conversation and every precious moment with my loved ones.
One of the most fulfilling parts has been demonstrating what transformation looks like to my son. He is so happy for me and fully supported my decision four years ago. The relief in his eyes was unmistakable. Looking to the future, I’m genuinely excited about the prospect of being an alcohol-free grandma someday. That thought brings me immense joy.
I also have so much more mental clarity and energy for my business every day. Previously, I spent eighty percent of my life either drinking or recovering from it. Now, that energy is directed towards productive and rewarding work. I frequently share my transformation with clients, using it as a strong illustration of what human potential can achieve. It’s proof of the power of belief and the ability to change deeply rooted habits.
I truly can’t convey how thankful I am to be a joyful non-drinker. I empathize with those who feel trapped by alcohol—I know exactly how that feels. And I am incredibly proud to choose freedom from it every single day. If I could go back and offer my former self one piece of advice, it would be this: “Don’t let anyone convince you that consuming poison is normal.”
This journey has taught me that real freedom comes from within, and often, the most significant breakthroughs occur when you allow yourself to consider a different path. If any part of my experience resonates with you, know that change is attainable, and a life filled with genuine joy and freedom is possible.
Are You Noticing Signs That You Might Be Drinking More Than You Should?
Are you ready to take charge of your alcohol consumption and make lasting changes in your life? Annie Grace’s free Control Alcohol Challenge is an excellent initial step. In this free 5-day class, you’ll learn how to break free from alcohol’s hold and begin handling stress and emotions in healthier ways. Sign up today and take the first step towards your freedom!
Share Your Journey
Did you recognize the signs that you were drinking more than you should through our books, the app, the podcasts, or another program from This Naked Mind? We invite you to share your story here and inspire others on their journeys!
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