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This article is contributed by Shebna N. Osanmoh, PMHNP-BC, discussing how to nurture your teenager’s mental well-being.
Supporting Your Teen’s Mental Health: A Parent’s Guide to Gently Encouraging Therapy
When your teen declines therapy, it might feel like you’re facing an insurmountable challenge. As a caring parent, your instinct is to help your child recover swiftly. However, persuading them to take that initial step into therapy can be tough, regardless of how much effort you put in.
You’re not alone in this journey filled with challenges, whether they involve mental health issues or substance use. Many parents find themselves in similar situations, sometimes beyond their imagination. The positive aspect is that there are methods to gently motivate your child to consider therapy without exerting too much pressure. First, though, you must firmly believe in the effectiveness of therapy for your teenager’s mental well-being.
How Therapy Can Help Your Teen Avoid Substance Use?
The Effects of Therapy on Teens and Young Adults
- A report from the National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA) shows that 60% of teens who attend therapy experience improvements in managing stress and substance use challenges.
- According to the American Psychological Association (APA), therapy can greatly enhance young adults’ mental health—often decreasing anxiety and depression by 50%.
- A study from the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) demonstrates that early intervention through therapy can lessen the long-term effects of mental health issues, with many individuals noting a better quality of life post-treatment.
These figures underscore the significance of early interventions and therapy for both teens and young adults, particularly those grappling with substance use issues.
1. Understanding the Hesitance: Why Do Teens and Young Adults Say No to Therapy?
Case Study: Sarah’s Journey |
Like Sarah, many teens resist therapy due to a lack of understanding about the process or feelings of shame regarding seeking help. Adolescents often relate therapy to being “broken” or “weak.”
Many young people perceive addiction or substance use therapy as an indication of failure, often driven by societal misconceptions about mental health. Some may be shy about opening up to someone new or fear judgment. Others might not recognize the advantages of therapy—they believe only “others” need it, not them.
Furthermore, teens and young adults might reject therapy because they see it as a restriction on their independence. The journey from childhood to adulthood presents countless challenges, and therapy can feel like a loss of control. They might feel capable of managing their issues solo, even when those problems become too overwhelming.
Therapy often requires facing uncomfortable truths, and substance abuse can serve as an escape from emotions. This aversion can be a substantial obstacle, but it can be navigated with the right strategy.
2. Begin with Open Conversations: Discussing Therapy Without Pressure
Case Study: Mark’s Situation Mark shared his skepticism toward therapists and his anxiety about being misunderstood. By acknowledging his feelings without judgment, Karen fostered an environment where Mark could openly discuss his resistance, leading to a more meaningful dialogue about therapy’s potential advantages. |
For many young individuals, starting the conversation in a non-judgmental way is crucial. It ensures they feel heard rather than coerced. To initiate a discussion about therapy, focus on open communication. Approaching the topic with care and understanding is key. Rather than dictating your child’s choices, ask open-ended questions to grasp their thoughts and emotions. Inquire about their perceptions of therapy and listen actively to their concerns.
Conversations should aim at addressing your child’s fears and misconceptions rather than pushing them into therapy. If they express fear or resistance, acknowledging those feelings is essential. You could follow Karen’s example by saying, “I understand you might not feel comfortable with therapy, and that’s perfectly fine. I’m here for you, and therapy might just be a way to find help.”
By creating a safe and judgment-free environment for these discussions, you’re helping your child consider therapy at their own pace. This strategy enables them to feel valued and understood, making them more receptive to the idea of therapy when they’re ready.
3. Normalizing Therapy: Reducing the Stigma Surrounding Mental Health Care
Case Study: Olivia’s Change Hearing this, Olivia, who had been battling depression for months yet felt too ashamed to seek help, was relieved. She realized that therapy signified strength, not failure. Consequently, she began researching therapists focused on young adult mental health, feeling empowered instead of ashamed. |
For numerous teens and young adults, the idea of therapy is often tainted by stigma. They may perceive it as something only “damaged” or “crazy” individuals need. This stigma is particularly pronounced in cultures which value self-sufficiency and resilience. As a parent, it is vital to help normalize therapy by presenting it as a positive and proactive choice—similar to visiting a doctor for physical health concerns.
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Discuss with your child that seeking assistance for their addiction is a sign of strength, not weakness. You might want to share accounts of well-known figures or even acquaintances who have found healing through therapy. Additionally, emphasize that therapy is beneficial not just for mental health issues, but can also aid anyone in managing stress, enriching relationships, and fostering personal development.
By normalizing the concept of therapy, parents can help diminish the stigma often linked with mental health services. Sharing relevant anecdotes allows teenagers and young adults to feel more at ease when considering therapy as a viable option. Lowering the stigma around it can help make therapy appear as a normal, healthy activity instead of an extreme or unnecessary step.
4. Gentle Encouragement: Turning Therapy into an Option—Not an Order
Scenario: Jake’s Journey Jake felt a sense of relief knowing that Linda wasn’t pushing him into therapy. After some time and contemplation, he made the choice to attend therapy on his own. By framing therapy as a choice rather than an obligation, Linda helped him avoid feeling coerced. This sense of control empowered Jake to make the first move when he was ready. |
As a parent, it’s common to unintentionally make therapy feel like a non-negotiable demand, particularly when you’re eager to provide help. However, making it seem obligatory can heighten your child’s resistance to the idea.
Encourage your child lightly, making it clear that therapy is an option and not a duty. You might say something like, “I understand this may seem daunting, but therapy offers a safe environment where you can discuss anything, specifically for you.”
Sometimes, letting your child choose their therapist or dictate their own pace can significantly impact their willingness to engage. Empowering them to take charge of their treatment can foster a sense of control. For instance, allow them to select a therapist they resonate with, or to choose between one-on-one sessions or group therapy. The previous scenario illustrates how giving your child the freedom to make decisions can encourage them to welcome therapy. The focus should be on presenting it as a choice rather than a command.
5. Finding the Right Therapist: Identifying What to Look For and Easing the Initial Steps
Scenario: Aidan’s First Session When Aidan met with this therapist, he felt at ease enough to share his experiences. The initial session was challenging, but he valued being heard, which motivated him to continue. |
Finding the right therapist is vital. Not every therapist suits every individual, which is particularly true for adolescents and young adults who may feel exposed in therapeutic settings. Assist your child in locating someone who makes them feel comfortable. You can begin by identifying therapists with expertise in areas like substance use, depression, anxiety, or whatever your child is facing.
Involving your child in the therapist selection process can empower them and alleviate feelings of helplessness. Many teens may find the idea of meeting someone new overwhelming, but including them in decision-making can help ease that anxiety. Helping them find a suitable therapist—whether through their participation in the process or based on your recommendations—can demystify therapy. It grants them some ownership over their healing journey.
You might suggest looking for therapists known for being relatable or effective with younger clients, as they can often be more approachable and less intimidating. It could also be beneficial to start with an initial consultation or one-time meeting to help determine comfort levels before committing to regular sessions.
6. Exploring Therapy Alternatives: When Standard Therapy Doesn’t Fit
Scenario: Isabella’s Alternative Path Even though Isabella initially shied away from therapy, finding an alternative route aligned with her interests helped her stay engaged in her mental health journey. Art therapy became a welcoming approach for Isabella to start addressing her mental health challenges. |
At times, standard therapy may not suit a teen or young adult grappling with addiction, and that’s completely acceptable. If your child is reluctant to pursue therapy, contemplate proposing alternative support options. Choices like group therapy, support networks, or even family therapy might feel more approachable for your child. Some individuals favor non-traditional therapeutic methods, including art therapy, music therapy, or adventure-based therapy.
Online therapy platforms offering flexibility and confidentiality may also appeal to your child if they feel uneasy about face-to-face interactions. Such virtual sessions can provide a more relaxed, accessible entry point into therapy without the pressure associated with in-person appointments.
Presenting alternative therapeutic methods can help your child become more comfortable with the idea of seeking assistance. It highlights that treatment isn’t a one-size-fits-all solution and that various avenues exist to meet their needs.
7. Supporting Your Child Throughout the Journey: Being a Steady Support Without Overstepping
Scenario: Ethan’s Ongoing Support Ethan’s father, Tom, would gently check in with him weekly, saying, “I know therapy can be tough, and I understand if you’re not up for it. But if you feel like you need… “Taking a break is perfectly fine. Just communicate what you need, and I’m here to help you.” Tom fostered a nurturing, judgment-free setting that allowed Ethan to approach therapy at a comfortable pace, without feeling pressured or stressed. |
When your child agrees to begin therapy, it’s crucial to provide your support without being overbearing. Your role transitions to being a dependable presence. Show emotional support by recognizing the bravery it took to take that first step. Respect their need for privacy while still encouraging them. Give them the freedom to share only what they feel ready to discuss, and celebrate their progress, no matter how minor it may seem.
Check in from time to time, but don’t push your child to disclose details about their therapy sessions unless they are prepared to do so. Offer positive reinforcement for any progress they make, however small, and acknowledge that they are prioritizing their well-being.
Patience is also key. Healing is seldom a straight path, and there will be fluctuations along the way. Some days, your child may appear to be making strides, while on other days they might feel resistant or down. Remind them that setbacks are part of the healing journey, and that therapy is a continual process.
Conclusion
Encouraging your child to accept therapy may not happen quickly or easily, but with time, compassion, and gentle encouragement, it is achievable. The focus should be on providing a safe environment for your child to explore the advantages of therapy at their own pace. Each child is unique, but with your support, they are more likely to take that initial step toward healing.
Are you ready to start the discussion? Find the right therapist for your child’s specific needs. Healing begins with that first step—take it together.
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